You KNOW your job is safe as long as these guys are around...

Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter.  "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.  "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.

I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider" looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me, "Do you know how much this is?" I said to her, "I've changed my mind,  I don't think I'll buy that today." She said "OK" and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

I was sitting in a restaurant and watched a waitress attempt to pour a glass of tea from a large stainless steel tea urn. Nothing came out of the spigot when she opened it. What she did next about KILLED me... she actually lifted the lid and looked inside to see if the urn was, in fact, empty! When I confronted her about it, she said, "Well, you never know!" THAT's an understatement!!!

A lady at work (not our company) was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."

I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote thingy" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."

Several years ago at another company, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

Unfortunately, these people get to vote AND reproduce!!!

Have you got a funny but true story that would fit this page? Email it to Randy!